My Awakening And Divine Healing

My Supernatural Divine Healing 

As I continue with this series, I will attempt to share a little more of the back story to help put all of this into a more clear context.  In this post, I wanted to go back to my 'awakening' and super natural divine healing experience.

In May of this year, I was dealing with my second bout of diarrhea. These bouts may have been triggered by food that turned, or some bug going around, however, despite the source, they both turned out to be quite the purge ~ physically and mentally!

Each time, I had spontaneous recall of past events. My life would flash before me, and I would remember this and that, after years of not giving these old experiences a second thought.

Some of what was flashing before me in May caused me to feel regret, and even shame. Shame can weigh you down like a heavy fog, creating a myopic, limited perspective, like the misty morning
pictures below where the lake is barely visible until right upon it.

I had remorse flash through my mind about many things I did that I wished I didn't, especially with guys.  If I knew then what I know now, I would definitely have done things differently!  

At this time, while home resting, I came across Doreen Virtue's videos discussing her walking away from the New Age movement, and becoming born again. I was fascinated with Doreen's story because while I had long been a fan of her books and oracle decks, however by this point, I had already started selling off her decks on eBay!  I no longer had any interest in the New Age movement, nor doing readings.

I watched a video where she explains what it means to repent.  I wasn't raised Christian or Catholic, and was not sure about the process.  The way she explained it seemed simple enough. Find your own way to account for all that you did in your life that was in 'sin.' I'll discuss the notion of 'sin' more in another post.  In a nutshell, sin is anything that is not of God, logos, or the divine harmonious order of the universe.

After watching Doreen's video, I decided to write out all that came to mind that I regretted.  I lit a candle, put nice music on, and began a stream of consciousness in my journal.  Pages later, I realized just how much I had done that was disharmonious to my true nature. I began to realize that I could not trust myself, my thoughts, nor my human will-ful nature.  This was a very emotionally cathartic experience for me.

I better understand now that we should not be trusting ANY of our thoughts, which I will address in the next post.

Meanwhile, I was awash with this desire to know God more directly. I mean, I really can't explain what came over me that weekend, as it seemed so random and out of the blue, yet it over took me.

Later, I shared my 'repenting' with two neighbors, one, a fairly large, wheelchair bound black woman who loves Jesus and all people with every inch of her being.  She asked if she could pray for me, so I said yes. I could feel the power of her prayer resound through my body. 

Within one day, I felt like at least 70-80% of the heaviness I had carried around had lifted.  By the following day, I no longer had any sense of the emotional charge remaining at all. I felt so free and light, it was as if none of it ever happened, or somehow I was no longer connected to it. I was filled with peace, bliss, and such love, I wanted to dance, and hug everyone I saw. It really was astounding. It was truly a super natural experience. A palpable lifting of the 'fog.' It truly felt supernatural!

This amazing sensation remained with me for several days or weeks, yet did begin to fade a bit. On another weekend, later that same month, my husband and I decided to go spend some time outside, near the fountains at the local library and Civic Center. I brought my journal. It was near the area where we were married.

After spending some time journaling, I began to 'pray,' with my husband holding my hand, standing by my side.  After several moments of my so-called praying, which was more of a powerful fist shaking-at-the-sky unloading of whatever had been consuming me, I was again overtaken by a profound shift.  I suddenly felt a connection with 'Father' unlike anything I had ever previously felt.

For the first time ever, I fully realized ~ meaning I fully integrated a knowing through every cell and pore of my being ~ that God was my true Father/Creator, and I was His daugther, and it felt amazing!

In retrospect I now understand how many past choices were subconsciously motivated by a desire for approval and unconditional love that I had lacked.  If we don't receive this from our father, we will seek it out elsewhere, often to our detriment ~ whether we are consciously aware of this or not.

Although I had mentally (versus in person) forgiven my father many years earlier ~ this experience was quite different.  During those amazing moments, I was suddenly filled with a sense of unconditional love and acceptance for him that I never really felt before.  Any residual sadness of having never experienced a better father-daughter relationship totally washed away, and my heart and spirit were renewed.

My 'repentance' and subsequent ah ha moments and supernatural, divine healing was life altering.  I have since connected even more dots while listening to Jesse Lee Peterson which will be discussed more in my next post, along with his Silent Prayer ~ the primary tool for us to be still, listen, and know God, or the Truth.

In the video below, reordered several months ago, I asked why women are unhappier and taking more anti-depressants than ever, despite the rise of 'feminism.'

God is the internal light that will guide us if we but listen, and allow Thy Will to be done, rather than our own ego-based desires.

We suffer, even if we don't realize why as a result of rejection of our father, our Divine Creator, and Logos. It's only when we come into alignment after having lived counter to Logos, God, or our True Nature that we can finally see clearly, and experience an immense peace.  Isms won't get you there. Neither feminism, nor atheism will result in a life lived Rightly, free of anger, resentments, and dis-ease.

Logos Rising bumper sticker, kitchen magnets or t-shirts found here.

12-12 Full Moon & Message - Live By Faith, Not By Sight

Happy Full Moon Blessing ~ Feel the Warmth & Security of the Divine Loving Presence!

Today's message is from Jesus Calling Enjoying Peace in His Presence 365 Day Devotional by Sarah Young. Considering the potentness to this day, after a gorgeous full moon, this seemed an ideal message. Let the love of the Divine fill you up, illuminating your entire being like the brilliance of the rising full moon.

A beautiful sunset during a drive home from Prescott, not from the huge full moon of 12-12/

I don't have a picture to share, but the full moon rising on the eastern horizon, while colors filled the sky on the western horizon as the sun set was pretty magical. I had a feeling of relief come over me. I have no idea why, however, I did. I laid in bed, and looked up towards the ceiling to gaze at the wispy peaceful flying energies dancing above me. As I did, I truly did feel engulfed by a warmth, a greater lightness of being, and a sense that I was safe. 

I 'knew' I was being provided for and guided. I felt bathed in love. A sense of joy bubbled up with childlike giddiness, for no particular reason. My heart also swelled with gratitude ~ for the loving embrace of my husband, and all that I was being given, including stepping more into the role of caretaker for my Mom. So this morning, while reading the 12-12 Jesus Calling passage, I immediately resonated with this Truth. (Read some of this passage, below.)

Rather than feel weighed down, engulfed with a heavy fog that would not lift ~ as I had been feeling for some time ~ I felt the atmosphere clear, like the sun that finally peaks through after days, or even weeks of dark skies.  I have no idea why these blessed feelings came over me, however, I am so very grateful for the ease it brought to my body, mind, nerves, and my Spirit. I believe my faith grows, and as it does, it shields me from all that would have previously bothered me. It shields me from all that previously challenged my sense of safety as well.

It has taken me a long time to cultivate this level of faith. I've always had a bit of childlike innocence that I maintained. While I had faith, it was mixed with many more moments of self-doubt, confusion, and a struggle 'to figure it all out.'  In fact 'struggle' became my M.O. ~ modus operands. I believed I  was responsible for my life, hence my mind and willful nature attempted to steer my 'ship' with mixed results. If I trusted my hunches, things went well. If I did what I thought I was 'supposed' to do, as per the opinions of others, including cultural beliefs, results were not so good.

As I've previously mentioned, I searched for answers in my 20s by reading a myriad of self-help books in the burgeoning New Age market. I did not know where else to turn. I had tried counseling. And, as I think I mentioned in the Day 1 post of this series, I was raised atheist. Neither parent cared for organized religion. I received mixed messages about God.  The sentiments of many in my secular world was that religion was a 'crutch.' Belief in God was a replacement for believing in one's self. People who went to church were seen as less intelligent, or weaker-willed.  

Of course, I see things differently now. I even pray for forgiveness for ever harboring or perpetuating such thoughts. 

Our human mind is not so superior. We can never really 'figure things out' near as perfectly as our Divine Creator. Our ego gets caught in 'specialness traps.' We believe ourselves either super special in a positive or negative way ~ either above others, or supremely inferior. If the latter, we suffer in our story, sharing it often with the subconscious desire for attention or acknowledgement that we had it SO bad. 

If we believe ourselves superior, we mistakenly will our way through life, often unsuccessfully, or with mixed results. Our arrogance becomes the shield for all that is more loving, brilliant, and light. It blocks flow of the Divine. It hardens our heart, and we become like a desert inside, lacking the warmth, loving presence, Diving inspiration, and true security that comes with Faith.

Every detail of your life is under My control. Moreover, everything fits into a pattern for good, to those who love Me and are called according to My design and purpose.

Events may seem to occur randomly, with little or no meaning. People who view the world this way have overlooked one basic fact: the limitations of human understanding. What you know of the world you inhabit is only the tip of the iceberg. Submerged beneath the surface of the visible world are mysteries too vast for you to comprehend.

...live by faith, not by sight; trusting in My mysterious, majestic Presence.

Like the glorious 12-12 full moon!

Day 1 - One Year Bible and the commencing of this new series, my journey dealing with current challenges while also reading the Bible for the first time, and other spiritual and inspiring texts.

Day 2 - Be Willing to Go Out On A Limb For Me From Jesus Calling

Day 3 - The Dancing Mind from Anam Cara, by John O'Donohue

Day 4 - Remaining Present and The Great Spiritual Battle of the Mind

 

 

Remaining Present And The Great Spiritual Battle Of The Mind

Remaining Present & The Great Spiritual Battle

I am stairing at a blank page, wondering what my theme for today's post ought to be as I am without all of my various inspirational texts!  I packed the One Year Bible with some Christmas ornaments, lights, gelatin packets, Keto Kreme and Salted Caramel Keto Broth and sent it media mail to Mom's place. I figured, if I'm going to be away from my husband and our apartment which has some decorations up, then why not brighten up my Mom's place as well? The One Year Bible is a fat book, so I sent it along with the rest of the goodies to avoid needing to check my luggage.

For Day 1, introducing this series, click here. Day 2, Go Out on a Limb for Me, here. Day 3, The Dancing Mind, here.

The theme that comes to mind is the pursuit of remaining present. Learning to respond rather than react. And, how the mind, and our physical senses is viewed by Christians (and the Vedas) to be under the domain of Satan (or sub whatever other term) rather than God.  We need to understand how our mind works to avoid the potential for self-sabotage, and veering off our path. So let's look at this.

When I contemplate the entirety of our impending decisions, I easily get overwhelmed. It's quite daunting! Do we relocate to be near Don's family, taking my Mom with? Move closer towards my sister in the Pacific NW, so Mom can be near us both? Or stay in Arizona? Each area has it's pros and cons.

Then, we have to contemplate, can we live with my Mom?  If so, it would keep us from having to use up her long term care insurance. She could live well past what the policy provides, so extending her finances is important. Yet, she is more extroverted, we are introverted. She wants continual social companionship ~ which I understand ~ yet we sit in silence for extended periods working on our respective websites and content creation.

If it's too quiet, she goes crazy. If there is constant television ads, and all the 'programming' running non-stop, we go crazy.  We haven't had cable, nor a t.v. for most of our entire time together.

Anything that is missing, is of course our fault.  We 'took' it.  Her mind plays tricks on her. She can be totally sure of certain things happening, even if they didn't happen.  It is common for people with dementia to get stubborn. Some get belligerent. My Mom thankfully is mostly a joy, yet her limitations reflect her life choices and habitual mindsets.  Note to self. Start brain exercises!

And of course, there are continual questions. Within seconds of saying something, it's forgotten. It's frightening. She knows she has issues, yet as is often the case, she knows not the extent.  I can spend hours answering questions, only to have it all forgotten by the next day. It can eat up my time and energy reserves! Not to mention my patience!

How do I remain present? How can I best serve, with an open loving heart? How do I remember to not take things personally, not get too frustrated? All things that are easier said than done!

Witnessing a loved one go through dementia or memory loss reminds us of how fragile our mind really is. Who is running the show when the synapses get fried, or stop connecting?

So, what about the notion that our mind and senses are under the domain of Satan?  I have come to  understand this perspective, because our eyes and senses can fool us.  Ask several witnesses to a crime scene to report what they saw, and each will recount something different. The movie industry is predicated on making things seem real, even when they are not!

Our ego can easily cause us to feel superior, or inferior. We can get stuck in our stories, and be totally misled by erroneous beliefs, and empty promises. We are not given a rule book on how to understand and best use our mind. Everyone has experienced going a bit crazy or dark at different times. The mind is powerful and can be a force of good or evil; a creative force, or source of major destruction!

Satan could be defined as anything that is not of the Divine Natural Order, or Logos. Anything that counters God, or influences us to choose darkness over light is going against God.  If God is Natural Law, Satan is anti-Nature. If God is a state of perfection, then perhaps being overcome with anxiety, depression, and fear is NOT our native state, even if it has become 'the norm.'  So, if my Mom or anyone becomes filled with anxiety and fear, is it possible that in those moments, evil or dark spirits have taken up residence?  The late Derek Prince believed so, and created an entire ministry around delivering people from Spirits after healing his own life-long debilitating depression.

Some may argue against this, yet as I've toyed with these thoughts, I have found it to be a helpful practice.

Poor health has become the norm, yet it isn't necessarily our birthright. Perhaps we are meant to be vibrant, brilliant, radiant, whole, and holy as we were made in the likeness of our Creator.  Fear, depression and anxiety are unnatural states, even if widespread. So, if whenever these lesser emotional states consume us we immediately 'rebuke' them as evil spirits, it can teach us how to more fully realize our most illuminated state! We can learn to reject depression, anxiety, and fear, and affirm that we are whole, healed, and holy beings.  Tony Meyers healed from being wheelchair bound, and shares his beliefs that we are meant to be healed, not sick in Unlocking the Mystery of Divine Healing, available on Kindle.  His first book, The Lord Jesus Healed Me, The Journey of an Atheist to the Truth, which I have not read yet,  describes his condition ~ paralyzed and dying ~  and miracle healing.

Anytime our lower ego fills our mind with self-doubts, and less-than optimal ideas, and we accept those thoughts as true, and act accordingly, we are not living out the truth of who we are.  We are living out a lie. Satan deceives. He takes us off our path, continually tempting us to go rogue. To go away from Truth, or Light. He tempts us with the shiny sparkly things. Or promises of wealth, fame, power, an easier life, comforts, sex, or whatever works.

In each moment we have choice points. To acquiesce or stand strong. To do what is more difficult because it is Right, or to take the easy way out. To react, or to respond. To act out our impulses, or rather Satan's influences, or rebuke his sly temptations. We can align with our lower ego, or our soul's truth, Satan or God, the dark or the light.

I never used to believe that life was a battle between good and evil. I always believed that man (humans) were inherently good, and that how we evolved was influenced in part by genetics, and in part by our environment.  However, after years of traveling down never ending rabbit holes, I have come to accept the Christian beliefs that our earthly domain is a battlefield.  A spiritual battle field. We either succumb to Satan's temptations, or we choose to hold fast, and remain a strong spirit, or warrior for the light.

So, I see my challenges as opportunities to practice remaining present, patient, and heart-centered. To rebuke Satan, and turn towards the Light.

If I can remember ahead of time that some day, she will no longer be with me, then I can do my best to cherish each moment, and remain more present.  I know I will miss those moments of frustration one day!

If I look ahead, and maintain that perspective, my heart opens. I feel myself being infused with an amazing peace and love that overflows. In these moments, I feel closer to God ~ or what some may call the Holy Spirit.  It has already provided me far more comfort than the total of every New Age self-help book I have ever read.

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The Dancing Mind From Anam Cara ~ Celtic Wisdom by John O'Donohue

The Dancing Mind, From Anam Cara, or 'Soul Friend'

Today's post is inspired by the writing of John O'Donohue, a prolific author of Celtic wisdom.

This is Day 3 of my reigniting The Strong Spirit Path blog, sharing my adventures with reading the Bible for the first time, along with other inspiring texts, and leaning on God to illuminate our path  through our current financial and familial challenges.

Read Day 1 announcing reading the One Year Bible, here.  Inspiration for Day 2 ~ Be Willing To Go Out On A Limb For Me came from Jesus Calling, by Sarah Young ~ a beautiful, soft covered, widely read, heartwarming daily devotional book.

Anam Cara, A Book of Celtic Wisdom, by John O'Donohue is among the most poetic, insightful books I've had the pleasure of reading. I borrowed some of his wisdom to add to my own book, The Strong Spirit 10-Step Plan. Specifically, the section where he asks, with what type of vision do you view the world?  The styles of vision include fearful, judgemental, resentful, indifferent, superior/Inferior, greedy and loving. You can read about what they each mean in my or his book.

'The Dancing Mind'

O'Donohue also talks about there being many kinds of solitude, including a solitude of suffering, "when you go through darkness that is lonely, intense, and terrible." We all have had our 'bleak' moments, when as he writes, 'words are powerless to express your pain.'

He then goes on to share some beautiful images found in nature that to him represent a mind in rhythm with itself. A field of corn bending with the wind, rather than standing stiff against it. A wolf-spider who weaves her web between two blades of grass, also bowing with rather than standing against the winds that do come.

Yielding rather than stiffening up to 'fight against' is also a key lesson in Tai Chi, or other forms of martial arts. "Be like water, my friend..." ~ as Bruce Lee often repeated.

O'Donohue continues, 

We put terrible pressure on our minds. When we tighten them or harden our views or beliefs, we lose all the softness and flexibility that makes for real shelter, belonging, and protection. Sometimes the best way of caring for your soul is to make flexible again some of the views that harden and crystalize your mind; for these alienate you from your own depth and beauty.

I read the first half of this book in flight to visit my mom in April, or perhaps it was even earlier. I've intended to get back to finishing it for some time.  Just today, despite running late, on a whim I grabbed the book to take with me to our clinic. Now, at the end of our day, I am finally opening it. There was a cocktail napkin inside that opened to the above passage. I immediately knew it would be perfect for today's post.

When we crystalize our thoughts into beliefs, we can become a slave to those beliefs.  It isn't wrong to have various beliefs, however, wise men of yore often taught to stay open, and fluid. Be like water. Stay soft and flexible. The more beliefs we hold, the more space that gets occupied, shutting out room for anything counter to our beliefs.

When faced with something that legitimately challenges our beliefs, we experience cognitive dissonance. We may reject new information out of hand, not wanting to face the fact that our long-held belief(s) about a particular matter may not be as true or appropriate as we had previously believed.

It takes courage to face this. That is the path of The Strong Spirit!

I hope you enjoyed this post. Stay tuned, more to come!

Join me! Let's create a Strong Spirit Tribe!  Here's some cool Strong Spirit Path & Strong Spirit Woman Merch ~ Made in USA cotton shirts, hoodies, mugs, bumper stickers, kitchen magnets, and more!

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"Be Willing To Go Out On A Limb With Me" From Jesus Calling

"Be Willing To Go Out On A Limb With Me"

This is Day 2 of reigniting The Strong Spirit Path blog to share my  journey and current life challenges, while undertaking to read the entire Bible for my first time, ever.  It began here. Day 3, "The Dancing Mind" with excerpts from Anam Cara, A Book of Celtic Wisdom, by John O'Donohue can be found here.

December 9th Daily reading from Jesus Calling, Enjoying Peace in His Presence 365 Devotional by Sarah Young starts out with the above sentence. Here is more:

Be willing to go out on a limb with Me. If that is where I am leading you, it is the safest place to be. Your desire to live a risk-free life is a form of unbelief. Your longing to live close to Me is at odds with your attempts to minimize risk. You are approaching a crossroads in your journey. In order to follow Me wholeheartedly, you must relinquish your tendency to play it safe.

This passage could not have been more timely!

I will soon be spending time away from my home and husband ~ my place of comfort and grounding ~ to be with my mom to provide some assistance. She still lives in the neighborhood I grew up, close to my high school.  And it's getting to a point where she needs more full time care and assistance.

Mom and I from July 2019

I am happy to help my mom.  I love her dearly.  She has often been my number one fan and source of support.  She did so much to provide for my sister and I, however, I do not like being in that neighborhood ~ nor dense urban environments ~ at all anymore.  My nerves get fried from the increased stresses of parking, over stimulation, and some seedier elements which have made their way into that area.

My soul craves more nature, less density, more of a feeling of community. We do have that to an extent where we live now. Many nice people in our little nook that look after each other.  I am certainly grateful for what we have, yet the yearning burns steadily, and has been for well over a decade now.

I know that there is goodness everywhere. We need to train our eyes and senses to see it. So my challenge when with my mom in that neighborhood is to seek out the beauty that is there, which I worked on during my last trip in July.

That said the real reason the passage above hit home is because we have some serious changes ahead. I will be helping my mom ready her condo for sale. She can no longer live alone. While with her, Don will be running our clinic on his own. By the end of spring, when our apartment lease is up, we will also need to relocate. Whether we remain in Arizona, or relocate to be closer to Don's family in the Midwest, or my sister in the Pacific Northwest is still somewhat up in the air. We are leaning in one direction. Yet, we have 'parts' that resist this potential choice.

The human mind likes to know what is coming, and crave a sense of security. Yet our mind, or the aspects of the ego and our five senses are limited in their ability to know, and be secure in the truest sense. It only comes from trust and faith in God. And a little common sense!  Training in self-protection as an example.

The challenges are more than just relocation. It's also financial. We would feel 'safer' having more of a financial cushion prior to such a huge move.  And, especially as we near our 60s! We are also desiring to redefine who we are and how we do business, perhaps finally aligning more with our bigger vision, gifts, and passions ~ another risk in itself!

Our parents are aging. My mother is experiencing increasing memory loss, which is perhaps my greatest source of both grief and challenge. Don's mom also fears the loss of her husband of 65 years. Don's father is taking some strong drugs to prevent his prostate cancer from spreading to his bones. It is definitely weakening him.

At times, I feel like George Bailey, at that point in It's a Wonderful Life where he is praying to God, saying he is at the end of his rope. Perhaps my 'Clarence' type angel is around helping me, and I'm too consumed in my own stuff to notice!

Our ability to puzzle out logistics of caring for my mom, where to live, finances, our business, multiple family members in need or with issues ~ among other things ~ feels overwhelming!  There is no way my small mind will be able to come up with a reasonable plan, try that I may! I realize it's bigger than me, and gladly surrender.  Daily. And still, at times it's like a heavy fog that won't lift.

Except sometimes it does, and I have an enormous peace fill my being.  I know deep down that I can trust God.

A woman who rents another suite at our clinic shared a story with me today. Her grandfather was a wise man. To paraphrase, he told her that life moves along like a steady wave, up, down, up, down.   Sometimes, we hit junctures where the road forks, and a decision is upon us. Go left, or go right? Take the easy way out, or head into the seemingly more difficult path?

He told his then 10 or 11 year old granddaughter to take the more difficult path.

I've often considered the path that seems to offer up the greatest flow to be a sign that it was the right choice, whatever that 'it' was.  Yet I can understand the wisdom in taking the more difficult path instead.

According to our neighbor's grandfather, if you take the easy road, you often end up astray, far from your original path.  The difficult choice helps you stay on the path, even if that is not immediately clear.  You end up learning  more about what you are made of.

We experience challenges to help us grow.  While we are wired to avoid pain and discomfort, and seek pleasure, we have to override our mental parts that will try to get us to take the easy way out.

Adversity is what builds character, fortitude, and mental/emotional strength.  Our mind wants one thing, yet our Soul may want something entirely different.  And it's the ego that interprets everything as 'good' or 'bad' or 'easy' or 'difficult.'

Reading the passage this morning renewed my hope and faith, and willingness to travel blind. Take the risks, even if I can't fathom what to do beyond this very moment. To make things a little better, I packed up a box I will send to my Mom's place, filled with some Christmas lights and little ornaments I didn't use in our apartment. Why not make an effort to brighten up her condo with a little Christmas cheer? I also packed the One Year Bible, as it is bulky to carry. This way, I can keep reading while also being of service for my Mom.

As for being in my old neighborhood, as already mentioned, I whole heartedly believe our  true sense of security is faith in God. God is my shield.  In retrospect, I know God sent His angels to help me on more than one occasion. Once in particular when I awoke out of a trance, in the wrong lane, behind the wheel of a car, and a truck coming at me.  I still to this day have no idea how I managed to avoid a head on collision.  Some otherworldly force saved my life.

Here is more from the December 9th Jesus Calling reading:

Let Me lead you step by step through this day. If your primary focus is on Me, you can walk along perilous paths without being afraid. Eventually, you will learn to relax and enjoy the adventure of our journey together.  As long as you stay close to Me, My sovereign Presence protects you wherever you go.

Care to share your own insights? Ways you trusted God, and life turned out better than you imagined? I'd love to hear from you!

MY ADVENTURE WITH THE ONE YEAR BIBLE  

I began writing this post several months ago. I decided to go ahead and publish it, even though I've not quite followed through on my original intent to share insights as I read the Bible using the One Year Bible format which includes a bit of the Old and New Testament, a Psalm, and a Proverb for each day of the year.

I have never previously read the entire Bible, and felt it was high time to do so. Of course, unless one starts, one can't even consider completing it. I really enjoy reading it, however, I'm not exactly staying on top of the daily schedule.

More recently, I've picked up another little book I found at a book sale. Jesus Calling, Enjoying Peace In His Presence ~ 365 Day Devotional, by Sarah Young. I quite enjoy the passages and read these daily.

From Jesus Calling, Enjoying Peace In His Presence

Lately, there has been a lot of challenges for which I find it all the more essential to lean onto something greater than ourselves. When we attempt with our small mind to figure things out and handle it all ourselves, the outcomes are probably not nearly as spectacular as when we turn it all over to God.

So, as I will be spending time away from my husband while helping my mom, I thought I'd attempt to take time to reignite The Strong Spirit Path blog.

All of my mental, emotional, and spiritual resources, and even my physical health seems to be getting tested right now. I hope that by maintaining some sort of spiritual practice, reading daily or near daily passages will provide peace, no matter what may be going on in my present circumstances.

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER:

How To Know If You Have Been Psychically Attacked, and How To Protect Yourself

In this post, I want to discuss psychic attacks.  We have probably all experienced at least one, at some point in our lives.  Some may be more sensitive and aware of being attacked, while others may have experienced symptoms, but considered other sources as the cause.

At one point in my life, I did not play into the dark versus the light notion, however, that has long since changed.  I have personally experienced many psychic attacks, and I have helped clients clear negative entities.  This is a potentially very real problem, especially when people are unaware and caught off guard.

What Does a Psychic Attack  Feel Like?

Psychic attacks can come in many forms.  I do not proclaim to be an expert at all, but I can speak from my own personal experiences.  I sought out the help of a well-seasoned practitioner recently who also helped me to better understand how or why we get attacked.

From my perspective, everything is a form of energy.  Our thoughts have energy.  We all know how different it feels to be among people who love and support us unconditionally, versus when we are at the receiving end of negative scorn, harsh criticism, or when in places that just have a bad vibe.

The power of prayer (1), (2) conducted even at a distance has been found to have a positive impact on helping patients, and the energy of our hearts and our brains has also been measured.  One can do simple muscle testing to determine how the muscles respond to negative thoughts, versus positive.  Typically, the muscle goes weak in response to negative thoughts, and remains strong when focusing positive and loving energy towards the person.

I think this is just logical.  It just does not feel good at some level to have negative thoughts coming your way.  And when they do, that is a potential 'poison arrow' or psychic attack.  How much you are effected by it is dependent on how strong your energetic boundaries are.

If someone is secretly jealous of you, they may be unwittingly attacking you.  They have an unhealed part that has a knee-jerk response to take someone perceived of as more popular, more successful, prettier, or whatever down to their level.  Nobody wants to admit that they feel this way, and sometimes people hardly acknowledge this goes on at a subconscious level.

There are other reasons people attack, whether wittingly, or unwittingly.  Some people have a possession.  The entity occupies their energy field, and can influence their thoughts and behaviors.  I do believe that people who are ultra sensitive, and/or very awake and aware, or are working to dispel 'darkness' and share 'Truths' may be under attack as the dark forces seek to subvert those here to make a positive contribution.  Just my opinion, but I know many others agree, and have also been feeling attacked on a more continual basis in recent years.  Even if this is just metaphorical, it is worth being mindful, and conscious about how one lives and operates.

People who are always going out to bars, or whom are either taking a lot of recreational drugs, or even pharmaceuticals, and/or anyone who is participating in degenerate behaviors, or hanging out in dark/seedy places, and those who are very depressed, manic, or bi-polar will be more susceptible to attacks, walk-ins, possessions, etc.

Even those who are mindlessly watching television all day could be unwitting hosts of subversive programming, which is a form of attack!

When you receive a psychic attack, it can be felt in different areas of the body, depending on the issue, and other factors.

When attacked, you may experience:

Sudden onset symptoms that seem out of the blue
Digestive upset
Headaches
Fatigue
Very low motivation, especially when it's atypical for you
Sudden change to a low, depressed mood
Chest tightness
Neck pain
Feelings of being held back, or 'not like yourself'
Paralysis
Sudden use of harsh language

There could be other symptoms not listed.  And having a sudden onset of a stomach ache, or head ache is not in itself automatically the result of being psychically attacked.  This is of course not intended to be a diagnosis!  These are just potential symptoms to look out for.

I have had each of these symptoms come on at different times.  It just took me a long time to finally connect the dots that it wasn't me, or my eating something wrong.  I was being attacked.

Some people have entities.  This may show up as a voice in the head, or other symptoms, beyond what I listed, including:

Feeling taken over
Feeling heavy
Strong desires to drink or do drugs, or engage in other illicit behaviors
Being given instructions to do something that you know in your heart is wrong
Ongoing negative or dark thoughts

How To Determine if Someone You Know and Trusted Is Actually Psychically Attacking You:

If you feel more angry, frustrated, or insecure after being in their presence
If they are always responding with dismissive comments, or seemingly benign critiques of you, or what you are creating, without sharing much positive words of encouragement
If you feel or sense a loss of power, or sudden change in your own mood in their presence
If you suddenly experience any of the above symptoms when around the person

How To Protect Yourself

First and foremost, take care of your health!  Being in good health will keep your immune system strong, which will help you stay strong energetically as well!  The best offense is a strong defense.

Secondly, spend regular time outdoors, grounding.  Nature provides bountiful healing energy, especially when you are barefoot on wet sand, grass, or dirt.  The more grounded you are, the less flighty you will feel.  Get early or later evening sun exposure too!

Third, make it a practice to tune into your inner senses.  Check in with how you are feeling before seeing the person, and after.  Are there any changes?  The main thing to pay attention to is patterns.  A sudden change one time could be non-related.  But if you notice it each time, that is another story.

Pay attention to your inner feelings, sense of smell, and any intuitions, or physical sensations you notice.  If you feel upbeat, and inspired or happy in their presence, great.  You have a good friend you can trust!  If you tend to feel more insecure, moody, angry, tense, or tightness anywhere, or even if you happen to notice a foul smell that you were previously unaware of while in their presence, take note!

If you feel genuinely supported great.  If you are not sure if you are being supported, or if you are unclear about the other person's intentions and agendas, use caution when in their presence!

If attacked:

Take a salt bath.  Get the salt crystals that come in the 40 pound bags for about $5.  Add one pound of the salt crystals (not the pellets) to your bath, along with one pound of baking soda.  Add any essential oils you like, and even Willow or Crab Apple Bach Flower Essences.

Burn a smudge stick all around yourself and your dwelling places.

Burn salt.  Use a heat-proof container.  Place on a wood cutting board or safe surface.

Get outside!  Go barefoot and get grounded!

Ask for help from your own Higher Self, and/or angels, archangels, guides, God, whatever feels comfortable and natural for you of a higher power source.  Many call on Archangels Michael, Raphael, and/or Ariel to help clear, purify and restore harmony.  I also like to call on animal guides, and even to lie on my floor, or directly on the Earth and ask for all 'non-essential and non-beneficial' energies to be cleared from your entire Being and surrounding energy field.

In lieu of calling on higher beings, imagine being under a beautiful blue waterfall of light, and sense, feel, or imagine any unwanted energies washing away.  Fill yourself up afterwards with a white, silver, and/or gold light, green light, or whatever feels appropriate for you.

The Lioness Roars & The Wolf Bites ~ A Poem About Reclaiming YOUR Might

May this poem help you call back your power, accept your whole  Self ~ the 'dark' and the light ~ and be prey no more to the internal and external voices that cast doubt on Who You Are.

Be whole. Be Proud. Be Fierce. Be in Strength.

Be One Unified Sovereign Being.

Photo courtesy of Pexels.com

I Am Who I Am

I am the Light

I am the Spark

I am the Candle

that lights up  the Dark

I trust and follow my Heart and my Soul

Illuminating my Divine Goals

Guided by Truth, my sword doth protect me

Living honestly, humbly and reverently

Willing to slice through life's many deceptions

Clearing delusions, falsehoods & misconceptions

I am a Snake, I slither and coil

Your greatest plans I can certainly foil

I will tempt, cajole and cause you to doubt

Your own Truth and Trust in what you're about

I Am the Deer, gentle and kind

to those who earn my respect and my time

Tho taught to extend goodness to all and sunder

This surely can be our downfall and greatest blunder 

Watch out for the lion for when he doth roar

your silly delusions will be no more

I Am The Lion-ess who protects her dominion

With laser sharp focus & fierce determination

Photo courtesy of Pexels.com

I Am the Wolf, and will sink my teeth in

To all whom question Who I Am, 

& my worth

My apex predator will show you no mirth

No matter how much the voices will chatter

and lure, entice and try to control

I Am Who I Am, and Who I Am matters

and only I hold the keys to my heart & my soul

I Am the darkness within the Light

United as One, I reclaim my Might

And eat my prey with sheer delight

I am the Light & I am the Spark

I am the Candle that Lights up the Dark

Why I Don't 'Hate Men' And Disagree With Feminism ~ Yin Yang Principles of Balance

Why I Used To, But Now Refuse To Hate Men!

As I said, I can't hold back any longer.  This man hating issue has me a bit worked up, so here are my two cents worth.  Spoiler alert, longer post.  It may take more than a few minutes to read.

I, too, had good reason to 'hate' men, if I so chose.  Actually, I did once 'hate men.'  Especially the 'white men in the ivory tower' as was perceived by most to be the bane of all our societal woes.  I see things differently now, and will explain here, and in future posts.

I am bringing up the topic of 'hating men' because of the article written by Suzanna Danuta Walters, editor of the Gender Studies Journal, professor of sociology and director of the Women's, Gender, and Sexuality Studies Program at Northeastern University, titled "Why Can't We Just Hate Men?" and published in the Washington Post.

Walters starts her article naming men recently accused of sexual abuse (Schneiderman and Weinstein), 'mansplaining,' rapes live-streamed on FB, and men's 'red pill' groups, then writes, "Seen in this indisputably true context, it seems logical to hate men."

Logical???

Do you hate all apples because one in the bushel was rotten?  Okay, that one rotten apple can poison a few that it touches, but not necessarily all of them.  A few.

Change of Plans, Feeling Shaken, The C.O.R.E. Counseling System & Latest Reading

My Latest Change of Plans, Recent Emotions, & What The Osho Zen Deck Celtic Cross Spread Reveals

The Osho Zen Tarot Deck is definitely my personal go-to deck when I am seeking answers.  This deck does not mince words, nor does it sugar coat the many antics of our mind.  After a chain of events or perhaps 'ah ha's' over the Memorial Day Weekend, On Sunday morning, I decided to CLOSE my new store, before it really got going.  On Monday evening, I had completely changed direction ~ probably the direction I should have gone all along.

Why did I close Nature's Art & Soul, my online store?  

Was I not being 'divinely guided' based on my rush of enthusiasm, as I envisioned my store being 'ground zero' for promoting the benefits of being connected to Nature, writing articles in the store blog?  

What was it that caused me to ACT so decisively ~ and uncharacteristically ~ and feel 'so sure' in those moments of taking action to create and build my store?

What did I do ~ or sign up for ~ that took me into an entirely different direction?  And why do I say that this is no doubt the direction I was 'meant' to take all along?

What do the cards indicate about all of this?

LET'S FIND OUT!

I closed the store on Sunday.  I did the spread on Monday morning.  What I signed up to do on Monday evening will follow.

My intention for the reading was to understand what this process was about, specifically why I started then so quickly closed this store, and the outlook for my being able to create a viable and monetized website, offering my services at a distance to help support our relocation, and my ability to 'work from home.'

Card #1 (The issue):  #8 GUILT (suit of clouds/mind)

Card #2 (What crosses the issue ~ hindering or helping): #8 LETTING GO (suit of water/emotions)

Card #3 (The Subconscious influences): CONSCIOUSNESS (Ace of clouds/mind suit)

Card #4 (The Conscious influences): II INNER VOICE

Card #5 (Old Patterns, the old way) #2 MOMENT TO MOMENT (suit of rainbows/physical)

Card #6 (New patterns, moving into the new): XI BREAKTHROUGH

Card #7 (My feelings & attitudes about the situation): XIV INTEGRATION

Card #8 (What I am attracting from the outside): VI LOVERS

Card #9 (My desires/denials): #4 TUNING IN (blue suit of water/emotions)

Card #10 (Outcome/the key): #8 TRAVELING (red suit of fire/action)

At a glance, numerologically speaking, THREE of the minor arcana cards are #8!  My birthday (month, day, year) add up to 26, and 2+6=8.  8 is about achieving Power & Abundance.  The other minor arcana cards were 2 or 4.  2x4=8!

Secondly, A LOT OF MAJOR ARCANA CARDS!  This to me indicates some big changes afoot.

Without going into great detail about what the guide book says about each card, this reading was SPOT ON!  However, what is said in the guidebook is OH SO ZEN.  So worth reading EVERY TIME, even though I also intuit on my own what the cards mean for me, or another when doing readings.

My insights:  

I am again wanting to remind others that I am sharing this journey as I believe I am but a hologram or reflection of what we all go through, especially with respect to the shenanigans of our mind.  

To free ourselves from our own mental enslavement, we have to be willing to see how we enslave ourselves!  And we need effective tools.

We all have many parts.  These parts get triggered when trying to 'ask for more' or improve our lives. This is the crux of the Holistic C.O.R.E. Counseling approach that I use all the time, for myself and clients.  

We have to become CONSCIOUS of our triggers, then OWN that when we are triggered, it is reflecting something within our own selves, (versus the other/external event) that still requires attention/resolution/release/healing/forgiveness.  

When we do this, we can connect to those unhealed aspects of ourselves, frozen in time with their limiting belief systems about who they are, and their world view.

Then, we can RETRIEVE what was taken/lost as a result of past traumas, issues, neglects (or RELEASE what we've been carrying around of the anger/beliefs/issues of others) then ENGAGE (or re-integrate) our now uplifted parts back into our higher/unified SELF.

Quite simply, it is a MAP for helping ourselves to grow up, and become sovereign ~ free from the trapped emotions and negative/limiting mindsets that cause us to REGRESS & REACT, vs. RESPOND.

This process is very effective ~ the only tools I have found to be so wholly appropriate and encompassing in scope.  I'll write more about this, but you can read more from my website, here.

The caveat to the following explanation/insights is that we all have a greater/higher more resourceful and wise aspect to Who We Really Are, but ~ unbeknownst to us ~ we more often operate from a less resourceful or wounded aspect of who we are.  

We can learn to identify our triggers as a 'part' and not the 'whole' of who we are.  These parts have their own consciousness, and exist, sort of frozen in their own space/time.  Typically, we cultivate erroneous beliefs about ourselves and our perceptions of 'the world' based on the themes/patterns life appears to be presenting us (and we therefore see it as 'real' or indisputable.)

This is less about what the common sense or neutral witness/adult part 'knows' and  more about allowing the part(s) to reveal to you hidden beliefs, and ways in which we are sub/unconsciously sabotaging our forward movement and evolution.  Key though is to be aware enough to know when we have handed the key to the car over to the parts, and are no longer in the drivers seat.  We have unwittingly gone into a 'trance' and flipped into a regressed, reactionary/trigger mode. 

Whew, now that that is hopefully more clear (and you found it at least slightly interesting) I'll share my process.  

Perhaps this will help others to go within, and learn how to reclaim their own lost power, uplifting their stuck parts,  to become  the sovereign and 'Soul' driver of their own vehicles!  Remember, "we only evolve as much as our least evolved parts!" ~ Dr. Martin Hart, creator of the Holistic C.O.R.E. Counseling/Education system.

Enough.  Back to the reading.

The issue and what is crossing the issue.  GUILT/LETTING GO

Yes, I was feeling a lot of guilt over this decision.  First off, I absolutely cherish our time that we spend at Echo Coffee on Saturday mornings.  We get up, quickly shower and dress, and walk there during the most peaceful, cool, and beautiful time of the morning.  They open at 6:00 am.

We have our big full fat, half and half lattes, and get a lot done.  Usually.  This past Saturday, during the Memorial Weekend, a time with an extra day off, and therefor a time when my mind was set on REALLY getting a lot done, I left feeling a bit like I wasted my time.  

We can't take back what was already 'spent.'

Although I was 'busy' researching how to market my store, creating logos, etc., I didn't accomplish writing a blog post, or more importantly, a website page.  I didn't edit my website, which really needs it.  So, in that regard, I felt like I didn't accomplish much, although sometimes we have to do 'research' which takes time and can feel unproductive.

I proceeded to spend the rest of Saturday ~ typically a day when I feel the most creative and productive ~ attempting to set up social media and prepare to advertise for the store.  My keyword searches at Echo netted me a big zero towards leads for a strategy.  Setting up all the social media correctly was tolerable, but all told, I was getting more and more anxious doing all of this.

I ended my day not feeling very pleased.  A thought passed through my mind. Don's question helped me to voice it.  Then it hit me.  

He said, "How would you feel the rest of the weekend if you did NOT have to work on the store, and instead, I could be free to work on your website or other things?"

I knew immediately.

RELIEVED!

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

Why would I start yet a new project, that primarily involves the one thing I most (pardon my language) suck at and despise doing?  I find marketing to be so manipulative, albeit necessary according to how we live in this 'civilized' money-driven world.  It's not part of my operating system.  I resent how much marketing has been used to mold people's minds, and sell useless goods.  

And here I was trying to start an online store requiring all my time being spent online, marketing and relying on social media.  To sell people more stuff.

I do not want to HAVE TO be a slave to social media.  I'm okay participating when I'm in the mood, but not out of obligation.  

I'd rather be on my piece of land, gardening, training, meditating, or feeding animals.  WTF was I thinking?

Choosing products to sell was fun enough.  But the rest is just not my forte.

I enjoy creating my blogs, my website and YouTube channel.  Putting up quick pics on Instagram can be engaging.  It's the  'HAVING TO' that clashes with my quest for FREEDOM ~ for me. 

This caused me to ponder, what was that electric feeling I had that spurned me to act so decisively and jump into this store?

I felt a sense of guilt for having diverted from what would have been a better use of my time and planning for my big picture goals.

I felt a bit of guilt for bypassing my own values and true nature ~ I love being in Nature WAY MORE than using technology.  And I am an introvert.  I'm just not a fan of the idle superficial dribble that Facebook represents to me.  The groups are great.  But from a big picture perspective, it all seems like a massive time-sucking distraction.

Why would I have this seeming area of self-sabotage come up now?  I was really feeling momentum of a flow expanding in my life.


Now I felt shaken.

Could I no longer trust my primary operating system?  It took me my lifetime thus far to re-calibrate it!

A primary tenet of the C.O.R.E. systems says:  We don't always get what we 'want' (or think we want), but we always get what we need.

The reading helped me name my ill ease over this.  And, it gave me permission to just let it go!

I know nothing is for naught, despite my parts that begrudged having 'wasted' my time.  But this reading, and a little writing/reflecting through the rest of the weekend helped me uncover some beliefs that I AM SO READY TO RE-WIRE AND RELEASE, such as:

• Life is a struggle
• We must work hard to earn _____ (money, love, God's love, etc.)
• It is dangerous to be passionate about something ~ I face potential persecution (my dad going ballistic when sharing my interest/excitement about a topic I was reading about, and many other times when my interests were quickly poo-pooed)
• If it is dangerous to feel passionate about something, and my feelings are part of my operating system, then my operating system must be flawed
• If my operating system is flawed, then I need to somehow squelch my feelings related to my passion
• I know, I can encase my feelings into an iceberg and submerge them deep into the recesses of my mind (Remember the Earth Magic Card spread last week with SUBMERGE/ICEBERG as the primary issue?  See how this all ties together???

As per the reading:

Step one:  Let Go!

Let go of my mind's perceptions of having wasted my time.

Let go of my self doubts.

Let go of the store!

Let go of all those above FALSE BELIEFS BORN OF YESTER YEAR!

The rest of the reading fully supported this.

The subconscious influences being CONSCIOUSNESS was quite interesting.  As per the Osho Zen guidebook, The Buddha pictured is:

 ...so expansive he has gone even beyond the stars, and above his head is pure emptiness.  He represents the consciousness that is available to all who become a master of the mind and can use it as the servant it is meant to be.

When you choose this card, it means that there is a crystal clarity available right now, detached, rooted in the deep stillness that lies at the core of your being.  There is no desire to understand from the perspective of the mind - the understanding you have now is existential, whole, in harmony with the pulse of life itself.  Accept this as a great gift, and share it.

Sounds like the C.O.R.E. Counseling principles!

The conscious influences, INNER VOICE:

The inner Voice speaks not in words but in the wordless language of the heart.  It is like any oracle who only speaks the truth....

There are times in our lives when too many voices seem to be pulling us this way and that.  Our very confusion in such situations is a reminder to seek silence and centering within.  Only then are we able to hear our truth.

Card #5 Old Patterns:  MOMENT TO MOMENT

Actually, I love this card.  The fact that it is in the 'past/old patterns' position indicates to me that I had achieved the ability to live more in the present moment.  As described in the guidebook:

This card challenges us to move away from our preoccupations with other spaces and other times, and stay alert to what is happening in the here and now.  Life is a great ocean in which you can play if you drop all your judgments, your preferences, and the attachment to the details of your long-term plans.  Be available to what comes your way, as it comes.  And don't worry if you stumble or fall; just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, having a good laugh, and carry on.

I certainly had to drop a lot of preconceptions about what is healthy to turn away from what I now believe to be a very unnatural vegan diet.  More recently, I had to recognize that this notion  that an online store would help me realize personal freedom, when I prefer to live more simply and minimally, rather than promote consumerism, was clearly flawed.


Card #6, New Patterns/What is coming in or  near future:  BREAKTHROUGH:

The predominance of red in this card indicates at a glance that its subject is energy, power and strength.  The brilliant glow emanates from the solar plexus, or center of power on the figure, and the posture is one of exuberance and determination.  All of us occasionally reach a point where 'enough is enough'.  At such times it seems we must do something, anything, even if it later turns out to be a mistake, to throw off the burdens and restrictions that are limiting us.  If we don't they threaten to suffocate and cripple our very life energy itself. 

Perhaps my 'something/anything was the store?

If you are now feeling that 'enough is enough', allow yourself to take the risk of shattering the old patterns and limitations that have kept your energy from flowing.  In doing so you will be amazed at the vitality and empowerment this Breakthrough can bring to your life.

After some contemplation, I could now see how creating the store (and getting frustrated, or reaching my 'enough is enough' limit) was precisely how my higher Self helped set me up for this major breakthrough!  My higher Self knew that this would end my attachment to 'struggle' as an M.O.

Card #7, How I perceive the situation/myself in the situation:  XIV - INTEGRATION:

I'll just share a bit about the symbolism:  The eagle and swan are "both beings of flight and majesty." The eagle embodies "power and aloneness."  The swan embodies "space and purity", swimming with ease on the waters of our emotions.

We are the union of the eagle and swan:  male and female, fire and water, life and death.  The card of integration is the symbol of self-creation, new life, and mystical union; otherwise known as alchemy.

I have definitely been on a mission to integrate my values, gifts,  and greatest desires into a purpose-filled, meaningful life.


Card #8 - What I am attracting from the outside:  VI THE LOVERS

I must note that I've used this deck for years.  The Lovers card rarely emerged, whether for myself or others.  However, in the last several years, I have pulled it for personal spreads more often.

Here is what the Zen book has to say about the significance of this major arcana card.

What we call love is really a whole spectrum of relating, reaching from the earth to the sky.  At the most earthly level, love is sexual attraction.  Many of us remain stuck there, because our conditioning has burdened our sexuality with all kinds of expectations and repressions.

He goes on to say that the main problem is that sexual love never lasts.  Perhaps this is true for many. I think he means the initial attraction stage that brings people together.  The ongoing intimacy requires both partners to be intimate, to act lovingly, to create time, and to realize the profound importance of maintaining a healthy connection on every level ~ sexual to spiritual.  These are not separate to me.

He continues to discuss how as we mature, we can experience a higher love, one that "honors the unique individuality of the other."

We begin to understand that our partner often functions as a mirror, reflecting unseen aspects of our deeper self and supporting us to become whole.  This love is based in freedom, not expectation or need.  Its wings take us higher and higher towards the universal love that experiences all as one.

I certainly always loved pulling The Lovers card!  In what manner am I attracting this from the outside?  Am I being a mirror for others to see these aspects within their own selves?  A magnet for self-reflection?

Perhaps when we are in our Divine alignment, we become a beacon of light.  The love within radiates out, unfettered by the heaviness of our unexplored, unresolved parts.  This is the healing and the blessing of grace we receive when we do the inner work.

The last two cards, card #9 - my desires/denials (TUNING IN), and card #10 (TRAVELING) are straight forward enough.  

It is through tuning in, or meditating that we can connect with our 'neutral witness' and simply observe, dispassionately, the antics of the mind without letting ourselves get emotionally hooked into our many fleeting thoughts.

To develop the knack of taking a distance from the mind is one of the greatest blessings.  It is what meditation is all about really - not chanting a mantra, or repeating an affirmation, but just watching, as if the mind belongs to somebody else.  You are ready to take this distance now, and to watch the show without getting caught up in the drama.  Indulge yourself in the simple freedom of Turning In whenever you can, and the knack of meditation will grown and deepen in you.

Card #10, the Outcome card - TRAVELING to me represented that yes, as a result of this recent experience, and the subsequent breakthrough, the result will be the move.  I had the sense that all will fall into place.  This all helped me to finally break free of some residual beliefs from my old way of operating through struggle, or having to work hard to earn money, love, appreciation, whatever.

I learned that I would freeze my feelings to help me cope.  Since I received such a shocking response to my trying to share my feelings of inspiration at a young age,  and had essentially been talked out of most of the rest of my potential courses of study, I must have developed a protection mechanism that would go something like this:  "If sharing what I love, or am passionate about, could bring such harsh criticism or persecution, then I (enter some hero part) better put the FREEZE on any feelings that arise that resemble feeling inspired, to protect the rest of me from that potential pain/persecution.

I tended to engage in pursuits that required too much focus on my weaknesses, too little emphasis on letting my gifts/strengths really shine.  We really need to get ourselves aligned to shine!

That's one big ah ha to me.

Interestingly, as we reclaim what we lost ~ my passion/feelings that indicate to me that there is something good and exciting here worth considering ~ and trace our issues back to the root, it's like they unravel from our existence.  They unravel from our subconscious or cellular memories as if they just vanish.  We know we had this issue, but the emotional charge or association so disintegrates, it's as if it were only a dream that fades with the waking light.

Suddenly, we reflect back, and things don't seem so rough or bad.  It just became blown out of proportion in the minds of those parts that froze the 'trauma/challenge/neglect' in its own space time reality.  It was stuck on a 'story.' That aspect of us gets stunted in its growth.  Our present day adult needs to go back to engage with these younger aspects, and help them merge and re-integrate within us.

So what did I sign up for instead?  What was it that I had a deep resonance with all along?  STAY TUNED!  That will be next!

Intereste in this deck?  Please consider making your purchase through my link.  I receive a very small commission, but every little bit helps.  Thank you! 

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